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Saturday, July 02, 2005
Get awesome Chapter 1 - 4 Secrets of Happy People This is according to a friend of mine... ( 1 ) J Your Life Has Purpose And Meaning. JYou are not here just to fill space or to be a background character in someone else’s movie. Consider this: nothing would be the same if you did not exist. Every place you have ever been and everyone you have ever spoken to would be different without you. We are all connected, and we are all affected by the decisions and even the existence of those around us. ( 2 ) J Use A Strategy For Happiness. JWe assume that happy and unhappy people are born that way. But both kinds of people do things that create and reinforce their moods. Happy people let themselves be happy. Unhappy people continue doing things that upset them. ( 3 ) J You Don’t Have To Win Every Time. JUltracompetitive people, who always need to win, end up enjoying things less. If they lose they are very disappointed, and if they win it’s what they expected would happen anyway. ( 4 ) J Your Goals Should Be Aligned With One Another. JThe four tires of your car have to be properly aligned; otherwise the left tires will be pointed in a different direction from the right tires and the car won’t work. Goals are just like that. They all must be pointed in the same direction. If your goals conflict with one another, your life may not work. ( 5 ) J Choose Your Comparisons Wisely. JMany of our feelings of satisfaction or dissatisfaction have their roots in how we compare ourselves to others. When we compare ourselves to those who have more, we feel bad. When we compare ourselves to those who have less, we feel grateful. Even though the truth is we have exactly the same life either way, our feelings about our life can vary tremendously based on who we compare ourselves with. Compare yourself with those examples that are meaningful but that make you feel comfortable with who you are and what you have. ( 6 ) J Cultivate Friendship. JRekindle past relationships, and take advantage of opportunities at work or among your neighbors to expand your friendship base. People need to feel that they are part of something bigger, that they care about others and are cared about by others in return. ( 7 ) J Turn Off The TV. JTelevision is a creamy filing that distracts us from the substance of our lives. ( 8 ) J Accept Yourself -- Unconditionally. J You are not just the size of your bank account, the neighborhood you live in, or the type of work you do. You are, just like everyone else, an almost inconceivably complicated mix of abilities and limitations. ( 9 ) J Remember Where You Came From. JThink about and celebrate your ethnicity. Often we feel lost in a vast and complex world. There is tremendous comfort in knowing your ethnic heritage. It gives you a history, a sense of place, a uniqueness that remains no matter what else is going on around you. ( 10 ) J Limit Yourself To Thinking About One Subject As You Lie Down To Sleep. JThose who have a lot anxiety let their thoughts shoot around from one subject to another as they try to go to sleep until, in a matter of minutes, they have created a virtual catalogue of problems. With all these problems, you’ll ask yourself, how can I possibly sleep?Tonight as you are brushing your teeth, come up with something you’d like to think about when slip under the covers. If other thoughts start to intrude, guide yourself back to that one subject. ( 11 ) J Friendship Beats Money. JIf you want to know if people are happy, don’t ask them how much money they have in bank. Don’t ask how large their take-home salary is. Ask them about their friends. ( 12 ) J Have Realistic Expectations. JPeople who are happy don’t get everything they want, but they want most of what they get. In other words, they rig the game in their favor by choosing to value things that are within their grasp. People who find themselves dissatisfied in life often set unreachable goals for themselves, setting themselves up to fail. Yet people who set high goals for themselves and reach them are not happier than people who set and reach more modest goals.Whether you are assessing your position at work or your relationship with your family, don’t begin with fantasy pictures of the world’s richest person or the world’s ideal family. Stay with reality and strive to make things better not perfect. ( 13 ) J Be Open To New Ideas. JNever stop learning and adapting. The world will always be changing. If you limit yourself to what you knew and what you were comfortable with earlier in your life, you will grow increasingly frustrated with your surrounding as you age. ( 14 ) J Share With Others How important They Are To You. JRelationship is built on mutual appreciation, and there is no better way to show that appreciation than to tell someone how much you care. ( 15 ) J If you’re Not Sure, Guess Positively. JUnhappy people take a situation in which they are not sure and come to a negative conclusion. For example, if they aren’t certain why another person is being nice, they assume that the person must have a hidden selfish posted @ 2:22 PM |